If your WHY does not make you CRY….

As I embark on this new venture in life, one of the very first things asked is “what is my why”?  Why do I want to do this?  What is the driving force behind looking for something more?  My family.  Hushand, son, father, mother, brother and sister.  Being able to provide without limitations.  That includes time limitations as well as financial.  Prior to marrying my husband in 2009 at the ripe age of 38, I had been a single mother for 12 years.  During that time, we had our ups and our downs.  In the beginning, when my son was younger, I was working a late shift, not able to pick him up some nights until 9:30.  Over the years, there were a variety of circumstances that would not allow me to do things I wanted to do for him.  Whether it involved being able to be there physically or being able to provide for him financially.

So here we are in 2010, a year and some change after marrying my wonderful husband and not much has changed as far as time or money.  That has nothing to do with my husband not being able to provide.  He does a very good job at that.  But I am a healthy, capable woman who should be able to bring more to the table.  Right? Right.  Just because a woman gets married, does not mean she should look to her husband to supply all her needs and make her life some fairytale we see in the movies.  Not.  As a woman, I feel it is my duty to ensure that my household is running at its peak and beyond.  A Proverbs 31 woman does not wait for her husband to bring home the bacon, she goes out and gets it herself and her husband AND God praises her.  If God praises the woman who gets up early and stays up late to make sure her family is being provided for, then who am I to sit back and not do the same? 

During my training, the one thing I can say is repeated over and over again is, if your why does not make you cry, it’s time to find a bigger why.  I have cried so many nights over not being able to do the things I want and need to do.  Some people may look at my life and say, I wish I DID have what she has.  Even if I don’t have much, there is always someone worse off than me.  This I know.  But I serve a God who says, “I come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly” (John 10:10).  Not “just enough”.  But MORE ABUNDANTLY.  It was never God’s intention for us to just get by. 

As you contemplate your why, does it make you want to walk over coals, does it make you want to get up early and stay up late, does it make you want to look at EVERY opportunity that crosses your path that could improve their life or yours?  Does it make you want to CRY?  Don’t cheat yourself or them out of discovering an answer to your questions.  God opens many doors, and none of them are wrong.  But you have to walk through one to get to the promise.

Haters, Skeptics, Cynics, Doubters - Let's Call a Spade a Spade...

We all have them.  In one way, form or fashion, you encounter a cynic on a daily basis.  By definition a cynic is: a person who believes that only selfishness motivates human actions and who disbelieves in or minimizes selfless acts or disinterested points of view.  Just because your views are not the same as others, does not mean there is a need to discredit their beliefs.  This is America.  Land of the Free, Home of the Brave...RIGHT?  Or is it?  Are we really free to believe and practice those beliefs?  Are we really brave enough to step out of formation and pursue those dreams?? For some, yes.  For the majority, a resounding no.  

 

Some are afraid to promote their beliefs or follow their dreams out of fear of being ostracized, black-listed, cast out, excluded or snubbed.  So is that really being free?  Or captive to the conformity of what is believed to be politically correct?  What does being politically correct really mean?  Ummmm, being socially acceptable.  But why do we fight so hard to have freedom, only to revert back to what everyone else is doing anyway?  And who was given authority to socially accept me? Huh, another blog another time...An African Proverb says: "There are two things which you have complete dominion, authority and control of your mind and your mouth".  Start speaking for yourself and stop thinking for others.

 

I go to work at a job that brings me not an ounce of joy because that is what I was taught to do.  Out of necessity of doing what is right and not what I want, I have embarked on several ventures, only to lay to the wayside because of cynics, haters, doubters and skeptics.  My fault.  Not theirs.  Fear will get you no where.  Fast.  Listening to skeptics will get you no where even faster.  What I call "safe players" believe is that conventional jobs give a sense of security.  They guarantee you a good living.  You got the benefits to prove it.  Right.  But what happens when they no longer need YOU?  Do you have a plan B?

As I take a new journey in my life, I am reminded that this is not about me.  It is about becoming the woman that I was put on this earth to be, to utilize my God-given talents and to maximize my abilities and provision for my husband and my son.  Walking the path that was so divinely paved for me far outweighs what anyone thinks or believes about me, or what I choose to do.  

So think about all the "spades" in your life.  Are they worth giving up on your dreams?  Are they signing your paycheck every month?  What are they doing with their lives?  Winners follow winners.  Ducks follow ducks. And game follows game.  

~Deuces~AJoy